When poverty speaks

I heard a voice coming from within; it began as a whisper

It was a voice informing me of how cruel life has become

In this life it is teeth for a tooth and life for a life

I saw them walking past and giving me all sorts of names

That I am a vagrant and a loafer if not a thief

At least maybe an aspired thief because when hunger speaks

It is cruel; it speaks of dark and scary things

Poverty has mind of her own; it has limbs and when it walks it runs

Look at children, teenagers in the corners of the street late at night and early mornings

A country where jobs are scarce, crime escalates like a wild fire

Others resolve in hawkers, their product is less expensive, their product good

At least not until dressed twice or food reaches the pot, then it is not so good

What can anyone say, the country where economy slack poverty finds reign 

Poverty is creative and it teaches art, how people can prey on others

Poverty speaks, and when it does it only reveals darkness; it is for a receiver to decide

Because even if poverty can shout, it is conscience that holds all the cards

The heart of the saints is aware of the omnipotent and omnipresent eye that is watchful from  above

 

 

 

Now that I am here

Yesterday seems like a mile back and many years that have passed

When everything was just fine, one was not obliged to appease a soul, and cares were less

My possessions fall short of mending all the burned bridges

This life I am now forced to live; I wish that I could hand this life to a simpleton to squander it all

All belongings in my care, handing them to anyone crossing my path and opting for a simple life

I no longer care about family name or status because in death that is just another manŐs flaw

At times success comes at a hefty price where one loses soul; see now this cross I must carry

If money could mend all bridges of the heart and nurture the soul

Then my guess is that the light of heaven can sway with a fat check and bag full of gold

In order for him to warm manŐs soul even for a split second that one feels complete again

To wipe all sins and clean blood off these hands, but that is hardly possible with a Christian God

If success means suppressing one another and turning into enemies then success is not worth seeking

But now that I am here it does not help to cry for yesterday, what's past is past

We learn from mistakes and God is a gentle soul; he gives equal attention to all grievances

The same great care even for those who do not deserve it; I do not deny my crimes

It is sad that jail does not pay for all inequities and not with the conscience that sings

However, now that I am here with all my faults and a sack full of broken hearts of those who cared

My family and loved ones who wanted nothing other than to see me succeed

I know now because I am here with all my faults; but being still alive must mean something

That at least the living sinner is better than a dead one because there still a chance for repentance

Now that I am here, I have also learned, because at times, experience is the best teacher of all

 

 

 

 

A Silver Light Fortress

I desire to spend some quiet time next to the sea

In a perfect valley where all great things flourish

The passageway to an amazing life, the way my life should be

A way over the top, somewhere among the stars

This is what any being is becoming, the very best of the world

At least that is what my guardian always tells me

Whispering into my ear behind black curtains and withering doors

That search for a silver light fortress and discovery of the mines of gold

It has since been my greatest desire to discover the true way of life

To discover a sense of belonging, something that sets this being apart.

I am still yet familiar with poverty and a life of confusion

It is high time to unleash a hero in me because if I do not hustle for myself

Then this circumstantial life is going to be my home and for the longest of time

I will start by completing wealth and success, for our mouth can prophesy

It all starts with a positive mind and unyielding spirit and all is a go

Every princess needs a castle to dwell in

A silver light fortress will be one for me

Once a reign attained, and a castle built

Brick by brick, it may take years for it to be completed

I will need to remember that even the fingers of a man are not equal

In some the foundation is already laid but for the hustlers like us

It is very different, everything comes with sweat and blood, no one to hold our hands

Showing us a way up, all we need is to believe in ourselves and keep grinding

We are born hustlers, generations of unrefined diamonds

However, dark or blue in this world will place our mark

Paving our own way forward regardless of the situations, we rise above every obstacle

We are prince and princess of the silver light because it reflects our existence

We were not born with a silver spoon, but with a wooden fork

With it we pick up all dirt and turn it to gold because of our endurance

The silver light fortress provides us with a key

It all starts with education, with every year of school, grinding of heads

With every brick of education laid with tears and endurance

It is only through learning that every hustlerŐs emperor endures

An educated hustler is familiar with winds of change

That earth stays not warm forever however with education

You might have a chance to bribe at times, and become more

Than by birth you were reduced in becoming and rise above the rest

 

 

I heard You Mum

When I was still young, I listened to all your teachings when you said,

I should know myself, what I was and that which I am now

All those chores that you instructed me to do

Those horrible lessons evvery night while all I wanted to do was sleep

Always passing hard judgments on children that I befriended,

Stalking them and collecting every bit of information on them,

Their homes, parents and hobbies; also highlighting even the pettiest or silliest mistake

You know a person through a friend that she hangs up with

I want you to know that I heard you Mum

Even though more than not I was rebellious

It seemed that you never came into understanding of me,

A child that you brought to this world, your daughter and only child

To you I was just your child and not a person, little did my opinion matter

Forcing me into partaking extra activities without my concern

You chose every subject learned in school,

a mamaŐs child that existed only to fill the gap and to do which her mama did not

An A student all the way however as it may seem with you it was never enough

I dare say the only person that mattered in your life was you and I existed to sooth  your ego

Everything was about you, even the way I behaved myself in public

I had to be on my best obedience so that your name would not be derailed

The way you poked me so that I should give up my seat for an adult on the bus

When every child remain seated, it had to be me standing, greeting and responding with yes MaŐam or Sir

Imparting me with respect, you said because charity begins at home

Mum I was listening and I heard you Mum

None of those words and little acts of kindness mattered to me, you were simply horrible and I hated it

At least until life humbled me and chopped of all my wings so that

I found myself in a cloud of dust so that I understood better, when they say

Even though the might bird fly up across heavens, it gets all of its water from the ground

However, you said every great thing has to start small and that life cannot be good always

I grew up without a dad and watched other girls enjoys moments with their fathers

You told me of this great invisible father in heaven;  not until winter storms did I take your word

Imparting a life of Christianity comes like the snow in winter, comes like the storms in summer

The house of the Lord remained open and it matters not that I was an only child attending

Your defense this time was I that needed to learn to stand alone;  I was not any child but your own

The path that friends and other people choses should not dither me from my goals

Mum I heard you, all lessons imparted to me as a child I heard them, and mum I learned

I heard you mum I want you to know on this cold day before cold dust parts you from me

When your mind filled with wisdom and your daunting voice now silenced, mum I heard you

Mum pay attention to me now, listen, listen now what your daughter is saying to you

Mum I heard you and all your lessons learned

 

 

 

Incognito me

Waking up into the bright daylight and meander through life

Like rain drops in the desert, I am the dessert, no happiness prevails

With a fake smile on my face that I since learn to master

What can one do if this is fate, story of my life?

In outside world, all is perfect, inside all gloom all cold but people must not know

 All folks must remain oblivion of this dark cloud hovering in my soul

I am burning my head is in flame I have seen hell, I am in hell.

These torments come and go; my folks have to test water before daring me

As for mood of mine, swings like a cane in dip waters

They call it bipolar but all I know is that I am in a constant pain.

Pains that I hardly understand to be awoken by screams and pillow that drenches in teas  

A memory come slowly my heart is pounding, it is phobia of unknown something I cannot fathom.

Story of my life, this incognito me.

No one told me that life would be easy but I have never expected a mountain over my shoulders

I am born a woman a well-bred never slouches; facial make up does to me wanders

It is ease to mistake a duck for a swan when world stood a distance apart

Acting has become to me a newfound talent,

I am a main character in my own life where I get to choose to be anyone except becoming true me

I came to despise this true reflection of empty heart and this stone cold soul

At times when unexpected the sparks of flames pushes way up but it is only my close folks

That catches the flames, as for the outside world they can search and search but nothing,

 Because there is nothing there, only shadows, incognito me.

 © Khayelihle Bhengu (South Africa)