I got on the treadmill at eight in the morning,

ran as fast as I could.

Okay Father if you really want me, come on.

After about twenty minutes I stopped exhausted and waited.

I guess today just

wasn't the day.



I looked everywhere for the woman on the flight back,

sure I would see her either at the hotel or on the coach or at the airport.

I met her a couple of days before. She came up to me and asked, "Oh weren't you on our plane?"

"Well yeah I came on a plane. No other way to get here."

"Well how is it going?"

"Well if you must know it has been the worst week of my life.

I had a big bust up with her, and got so pissed I started chatting up everybody's wives and got people really upset and told a few people I was going to kill them and all I have done since is get dirty looks off people."

"Well it can only get better," she said.

I got on the plane and fell asleep.  When I woke up she was coming out of the toilet and we started to chat as we got off the plane.

"How is it going?" she said. Did it get any better?"

"Well at one point I was so fed up I thought about swimming out into the shark infested waters until I got really tired  to see if I could make it back, rolling the dice."

She looked at me with her boyfriend with a strange look as if to say I wish I had kept my mouth shut.



We got to the checkout.

"Sorry I can't let you have all this medicine," she said.

"But there are two of us and I am going to Germany. I will pay for it separately."

She said, "Sorry I can't let you have it."

"Hang on," I said

"Is that how much you would need to kill yourself if you got fed up. It would just be interesting to know."

"I don't know about that Love but you can always go to boots if you want."

"Thanks Love,"I said as we walked out.






The dog looks out to sea

as he sits on that rock

The sun bleaches everything yellow

He waits for that ship that will take him from this place

this island he has been on so long

waiting to visit new lands 

But he will never get on that ship

never leave

because this is his place

Good or bad

he will always stay






I went into Macdonald's with my 2 pound voucher and

the Indian man behind the counter stared at me.

I got my food and sat down, 

then a man started to shout at a young boy 

who picked up a balloon.

"They are for young children.  Put that back."

He put it back as everybody looked at him

and I started to laugh.






I listened to Otis on the radio,

yelled out the song as people came past

must have thought I was some kind of lunatic

but I did not care

the way I have always not cared 

even when  I was at rock bottom

some people do not get up 

but day after day

up  I get like the man off the cross

nothing can stop me






I keep finding this poem on the floor

it tells of a different time

of a person sure he was different from everybody else

So sure he risked everything 

I am not sure I am the same person on that page

but at least I still believe






The woman came up to me at the party 

at which I did not have a ticket

She asked me who I was

asked if I was in insurance

no I could never do that I tell her

as I held her hand she said

you walk up and down here not talking to anybody

as if you were an angel.

And for a second I really thought it could be possible

she asked for her hand back shortly after that

then I started to dance and the night really took off






there she goes

the one with the big botty

around and around she goes

like nothing else or no one else.

I find that with all women

none are the same as another one

perhaps that is why I want them all

even at the same time would be good

we could live in a skyscraper 

that touches the clouds but with all the doors and walls knocked out

like a giant car park

or a giant ark floating on the endless sea. 

Just me and my girls and all that love to keep us afloat


I walked into the church a woman was playing the piano

I went over to her and told her that she played lovely

She told me it was Tchaikovsky and then she told me her wedding was tomorrow

and why didn't I come 

I never went to  her wedding but a few days later I went back to the church and thought about playing the piano not that I can play of course

when I went over to the piano there was no piano almost as if that magical moment had never happened


Marc Carver