(Photo of Phil Huffy)

 

 

Beetlemania

 

And then came the last of the Beetles!

Indeed, sales constantly slowed.

The newspapers cleverly said it

in proclaiming the end of the road.

 

I had one, you know, and remember

the feel of its primitive seat

and challenges faced in the summer

to turn off the blasted thing’s heat.

 

And as for advancement of romance,

at drive-ins or other locales,

I’d venture to blame its compactness

on the dearth of amenable gals.

 

My neighbor now harbors a Beetle.

I think it's a ’73.

I’ve thought about making an offer –

ten bucks and my old SUV.

 

 

 

Conspiracy Theories

 

Evil bagels team with knives                 

and hands and palms and digits pay.      

This deadly combination lurks              

to torment unsuspecting prey.                 

 

Basement stairs and burned out lamps     

await missteps and hear the cries,        

as ankles yield and tendons twist        

and bundled laundry falls or flies.                 

 

Snow colludes with winter tools              

to anguish sedentary hearts               

and widows sip their tea alone       

as shadows creep and day departs.  

 

      first published by Lighten Up Online    

 

 

 

Date Night

He ran from her

like a dog from a blender.

 

The shrill frequency

and inescapable volume

presaged pain

from which there

would be no respite.

 

All that remained

was to express his regrets

in a sensible

and unoffending way,

so as discourage repercussions.

 

    first published by Raw Dog Press

 

 

 

Maltease

 

Two Malteses were sniffing near a daisy.

The daisy hoped that help was on the way,

They spun around, however, and kept going

and the flower lived to bloom another day.

 

As they sauntered, there soon appeared rabbit.

(Some other dogs might carry on a bit.)

But those two scamps just didn't seem to notice;

if they did, in fact, they hardly cared a whit

 

As their owner advanced upon her charges

she clapped her hands and sternly called “now stay!”

The first Maltese remarked unto his brother,

“On the count of three, allez, allez, allez!

 

© Phil Huffy

 

Bio:  Phil Huffy writes away at his little desk in upstate, New York.  He is well represented in print and online.