The Top Of My Hill


The top of my hill
in Mahopac, NY
is home to a “supposed State Park.”

Supposed? Yes, supposed!


There are no trees in this state park
nor nature trails nor picnic tables

nor swimming pools nor fields

nor athletic fields or basketball courts.


The only path into the park is chained
to keep out the curious and
the misinformed who think there is a park.
It has been this way for years.


There is nothing there but overgrown weeds.

Big signs on the highway treat it as real;
driving by, you might be misled but

not the locals who know the truth.


This empty barren travesty of a state park
bears the name of our White House occupant.
Do you see a parallel here?



(Sign on Taconic State Parkway Photo – John F. McMullen)

(Picture from the State Park by John F. McMullen)


(Picture from the State Park by John F. McMullen)




The Little Existentialist Caterpillar
by johnmac the bard

I was sitting
outside my house
when I felt
something on my arm.


Thinking it a fly
or my mosquito,
I went to
brush it off.


When I looked, however,
it was a tiny
black caterpillar scurrying

down my arm.

Fascinated, I put a finger
in front of him and he
climbed up and began
to walk around.


Watching him walk,
I said “So, caterpillar,
will you become a
beautiful butterfly?”


Surprisingly and
he replied
“No, sir, I will not.”

Taken aback,
I asked,
“Then what is the
purpose of your life?”


“I know not, sir.
What is the
purpose of
your life?”


I replied “I know
no more about
my life than you
about yours.


“And how is it that
you can talk
and understand me,
little caterpillar?”


“I know not, sir.
It came suddenly
after a big flash
of lightning.”


“You are a very
interesting caterpillar.
Why did you
land on me?”


“You seemed warm
and dry. I have been
so very cold in this
changing weather.”


I then asked him
“What do you need,
little caterpillar,
to eat and live?”


He replied “I eat
plant leaves, sir.
Why do
you ask?”


“I have plants in
my house and it is
warm. Would you
like to live inside?”


“I would, sir.
Thank you very much.”


I put the caterpillar on
a rubber plant and
have not
seen him since.




Flawless Negotiation


As the alien spaceships
sped toward the end of our galaxy,

President Trump went on earth-wide TV
to proclaim

“Flawless negotiation
from a position of strength
has led to an agreement that
assures the preservation of our

way of life for ages to come.”


He added “Such an agreement
could not have been hammered out
with the timid approach
of the Obama administration.”


Just then, the entire planet
was consumed in flames.




It’s All About Me



Comey wouldn’t be loyal
Sessions recused himself

Tillison called me a moron

McMaster didn’t agree with me

And they all talked

About “oath of office”

They don’t get it

I appointed them – ME!


Well, maybe not Comey

But so what?


Jackson spoke nicely

About me

And he looks good

In a uniform


So I appointed him

To manage

Thousands of people

And billions of dollars.


The obstructionist Democrats

Attacked him

For never managing

More than 13 people


And they dug up

People with dirt

Never proven

So he gave up.



He would have

Been loyal





Nobody Has Ever

(Edited and Enhanced by Bob Zaslow)


Harry Truman had
The Berlin Air Lift

JFK had
The Cuban Missle Crisis
Ronald Reagan called Russia
The “Evil Empire”
Barrack Obama put on
Strong Sanctions


Nobody has ever put more
Pressure on the Russians
Than Donald J Trump

That was just said by
Donald J Trump

Nobody in the country

Played basketball better
In the 1950s, 60s, 70s, & 80

Than me

That was just said by me


 (originally published in “Poets Reading The News,” April 2018)






Dear Editor,


Enclosed are a few poems

which I sincerely hope

that you will choose to publish

in your fine journal.


In the event that you choose

not to do so, I hope that

your rag goes up in flames,

all your subscribers die, and

you and your staff rot in hell.


Respectfully submitted,

johnmac the bard


(selected as Featured Poem of the Week on the “Poetry Super Highway,” February 2018; and originally published in “Down In The Dirt,” v 159; July / August 2018)



© John F. McMullen


Bio:  John F. McMullen, “johnmac the bard,”  is the Poet Laureate of  Yorktown, NY, the author of over 2,500 columns and articles and eight books, six of which are collections of poetry (his most recent, “Live At The Freight House,” is available at Amazon in both paperback and Kindle formats).  He is the host of a weekly Internet Radio Show (over 240 shows to date). Links to the recordings of all radio shows as well as information on Poet Laureate activities is available at


Poet Laureate, Town of Yorktown, NY --
Poets & Writers Site -- 
In-depth Video Interview -- 
Bio --
"johnmac's news of the day" --
johnmac Author Site